A Parents Biggest Fear....

What was supposed to be a simple follow-up to Olivier's fractured knee...turned into a parent's biggest fear...

A bone tumour...

Nothing can prepare you for those words...Nothing can make hearing them any easier...Nothing...
I felt the air leave my lungs...An immediate weight pushing me down...My legs could barely keep me standing...A punch in the stomach...In the heart...I wanted to collapse to my knees...Not my Oli....

And yet...There he was standing in front of me...I had to be strong...He had no idea...I couldn't let him see the fear on my face...The tears in my eyes...

I remember looking over to Ben...Seeing how scared he looked...And reaching out to hold his hand...
The next few weeks passed by very slowly...I spent my days pretending to be strong...The nights I cried myself to sleep...

I would see his life pass before my eyes...I wanted to stay positive...But my mind...My mind...
I could see him with no hair...Sitting beside him in a hospital room...So thin...Iv's in his arms...Saying goodbye...

A parent's biggest fear...

I couldn't lose him...

Prayers...Hope...Trust...Believe...Faith...

And finally...The best news...Benign!!

I could breathe again...

I look at him today...I remember the fear...I know how differently things could have ended...I am a lucky mom...I get to keep my son...