Two Days

The big ultrasound

Just 2 days away

Seems like we have been waiting forever

And now

The day has almost arrived



I find myself overwhelmed with excitement

And very very scared



I am scared for my heart

Knowing this is our last chance

For a little girl

Knowing that this chapter of my life

Will be closed

Knowing I might have to let go

Of a dream



But I also know

That seeing a beautiful baby boy

Will melt my heart

And I no longer will be able to imagine my life

Without him




I am somehow unable to hear

What my heart is telling me

I think I have been feeling girl

But I cannot be sure.

Is it maybe because

I want to hear it so badly

That I am trying to convince myself

That maybe

Just maybe

My dream will come true...

But then

This loud voice of reason

Brings me make to earth

Screaming at me

Its a boy.

Is this because

Deep down

I know its a boy...

Or is this a way of protecting my heart from disapointment...

I just don't know

Every sign has been telling me boy

I should have no doubt

And yet

I still feel this pull

And I can't let go

That maybe

Just maybe





And so I wonder

How will our family portrait look

4 amazing boys with a little princess to protect

Or 5 boys, who will be best friends forever

In 2 days

I will know the ending

To this beautiful chapter



And I am excited

Excited and scared